Dave Ramsey fans are familiar with the saying, “The borrower is slave to the lender”. To me that paints a picture of a man hunched over pulling on chains and heavy weights. I don’t often feel like that.
I’m not lying when I say I love my life. Sure, a lot of days I’m frazzled or frustrated about the latest bout of dog nausea or unexpected bills. Still, the fact that I have a comfortable home and a loving husband is not lost on me. I’m the first to say I love where we live and treasure the memories we’re making.
If I whine about one thing very often it’s having to go to work. Now, let me put up a disclaimer here, and not just because my co-workers might stop in: my job is pretty darn good. I work with girls that are my friends and we actually have quite a bit of fun together. I only have a 10-15 minutes drive and I only work about 35 hours each week. For the most part our clients are great to work with. I get to educate people, most of whom actually want to hear what I have to say so they can be better caretakers. Plus, after starting out in my career not that long ago I’ve finally reached a point where I feel like I’m good at my job. And I do feel appreciated. My particular job is not the problem.
What gets me is that feeling I get on Sunday night when I’m in the basement hanging laundry up to dry and I’m so into peeking at the chicks hatching that I can’t imagine going to work and missing one. When the hay is just dry enough to bale and it’s going to rain and we’re both at work because we’re scheduled there until 5 or 6 even though the storm is coming in at 4. When the horses are out and the neighbors call and I have to go to my boss and say, “soo…”, which I also had to do that day I got to work and realized I didn’t turn off the hose that was filling the stock tank. Or how about the 15 farm meetings we can’t go to because they’re all on Tuesday mornings.
What gets me is not that I can’t do any one of those things because my employer is really great about being flexible when things are important. What gets me… is that I HAVE to go. It’s not like I can just stop going. I’m no different than most people – we usually don’t have a choice. Graduate, graduate again, get a job, work work work, retire and draw a pension (ha!). It is not for me. I’m not a princess and I’m not spoiled. I don’t have a complex. I just don’t think that’s how it should be.
I’ll pull out the blame-my-parents card on this one. My Dad hated his job when I was little so he quit and started his own business. That’s how it was for most of my childhood. He could schedule around us and during the summer I could go to work with him if I wanted. It was fun. Granted, I was a kid, but I think my Dad liked it too. My Mom had a normal job working for someone else but she only worked weekends so she was home with us all week. There was none of this 9 to 5 crap for me growing up.
Did anyone else read Little House on the Prairie as a kid and think it warped them? I can’t help but feel like THAT is the way life should be. I’d rather grow my food and take care of my family directly than go to work to earn $$$ to pay for groceries with ingredients that I can’t pronounce. I know not everyone shares my thoughts on this. Some people are passionate it about their jobs, love being there, would hate to do anything else. That’s great for them, and I’m certainly glad we have people like that out there working.
In case this post isn’t very clear, let me give you another example of that feeling I get about work that I’m trying to describe. I used to drive horse carriages in Frankenmuth. At the end of the night we fed all the horses and swept up the barn. I couldn’t wait to get the heck out of there and go to bed! Tonight Brian and I were out in the barn doing chores. We doled out hay and grain to everyone. I collected eggs (we got 9!) and hung around watching the sheep eat, checking their udders. Even though I was still in my scrubs and my shoes were wet I didn’t want to go in. I guess it’s just different when it’s your project.
Where do you stand? Are you good with where you are and what you’re doing or do you dream of something else?