I’m thinking about this some because my DH has gone away hunting and left me to hold down the fort.
When we first got together it took awhile for him to realize how badly I wanted to be outside working with him on projects instead of keeping house. I wasn’t really feeling my domestic duties. Years later, I’ve found myself taking care of the house more and more. In exchange, I like it that hubby does most of the outside chores. Especially now that is is getting colder outside. It sounds like I’m taking the sweet end of the deal but he wouldn’t want to trade – that’s for sure.
Don’t get me wrong, I love the fresh air. I love working in my garden and Brian won’t touch a hoe or a seed packet. I can watch the chickens. For hours. In spite of that, when I come home from work at the end of the day I’d much rather put dinner on and curl up with a book than don Carhart’s and trudge out to chip ice off of buckets. I usually help whenever he needs anything but that’s not everyday. I think I’ve gotten a little spoiled and…well… lazy. I can always justify it by saying that I keep a decently clean house and I carry a lot of the mental stress of running this farm. I toss and turn over every little problem while he falls asleep at the drop of a hat. We both carry our own weight I guess but I’m sure not the worker I used to be.
I can step up when I need to, like now that’s he’s away. After a little bit of a temper tantrum yesterday and feeling overwhelmed I see now that this isn’t that bad. I used to be so independent and take such pride in doing “guy” things: building things, making projects, overcoming physical barriers and wielding tools most girls wouldn’t touch. I’m still no sissy but I kind of like having a honey to do my honey-dos instead of struggling through things on my own. Today I put up a new pen for the sheep and moved them to it. I know for sure that I would have waited for Brian to get to it if he was around. It felt good just to do it my own way. 🙂
Are you different now than you were as a single person? How? Do you follow the classic roles of husband and wife or do you switch things up a bit?